Recently, a student forwarded me a copy of an article that appeared on the Internet from AFP, detailing how people in the US are turning to Feng Shui to help improve their love lives and their ability to meet someone, despite this being the era of Internet dating and online-romance. In the article, romance apparently can be yours with this simple method: “The formula for stirring up romantic energy is simple enough. Fresh flowers are placed in water in a wide-necked vase. The colour of the flower and the vase must be the same and can be determined by checking a person’s birth date on a Feng Shui chart or by having a reading done.”
I was not sure to be honest, whether or not to treat this as a joke or to consign this article to the garbage bin. So I thought, let’s be positive about it and write about the subject of love and Feng Shui. I think it’s time to get a few things straight when it comes to Cupid and your Favourable Direction.
Can Feng Shui help Relationships?
The short answer to this question is yes. But of course, there is also a long answer. First, people need to understand what exactly is the ‘relationship’ that Feng Shui can help with. There are many Feng Shui classics out there but I have yet to come across one that asks the Feng Shui master to play Cupid or St Valentine or asks us to exchange our Luo Pan for a Cupid’s bow.
And when I say improving, I do not mean that you can use Feng Shui to make someone ‘like’ you. Feng Shui is not some kind of black magic or love voodoo. I mean, let’s face it, if all it really took was a vase and flowers of the same colour, why not put Angeline Jolie’s or Brad Pitt’s picture inside the vase as well? If you are going to have false hope, you might as well go all the way.
So, let’s get it straight here: it ain’t about the vase, it ain’t about the flowers, and it ain’t about Mandarin ducks in pairs. I hate to break people’s duck about this (pardon the pun), but that is the truth. And there is no “Love Corners” in Classical Feng Shui either. There is no one direction or universal section of a person’s house that can help you ‘enhance’ your relationship luck. And it does not matter how many peony flower paintings you put there, or how many vases of water you put there.
This is not to say that in Feng Shui, there are no directions or sectors that can help you with relationships. In Eight Mansions Feng Shui, the energies of Yan Nian star are usually tapped to help improve relationship matters, while Flying Star practitioners will usually look to make use of the 4-1 or 1-4 star combinations. But these are not in any way ‘love combinations, nor is the Yan Nian star some hippy Love Corner direction. If you have read in a book that says Yan Nian is the Love Corner or South is the Love Corner, it’s simply because it’s more marketable to label something as the ‘love corner’ than to tell people that it’s about improving their people-to-people interaction skills!
Tapping into the Right Energies
So, let’s get down to what Feng Shui can do for you, when it comes to the subject of relationships.
First, let’s understand what relationship means in classical Feng Shui. Relationships do not necessarily refer to connections of the amorous or romantic kind. Rather, when we talk about improving and helping relationships in Feng Shui, we are talking about general people-to-people relationships. So what are these people-to-people relationships? They include family relationships, personal relationships with friends, superiors, colleagues, business partners, business associates or suppliers, for example. Now, it does not exclude romantic relationships but it is not exclusively referring to romantic relationships either.
So how does Feng Shui help with relationships of the romantic and non-romantic kind? And what kind of help are we talking about?
Improving relationships through classical Feng Shui is about making use of the energies (Qi) in certain locations of the home or office to assist with relationships by helping to smooth the path of meeting people, or interacting with people. It creates opportunities for interaction, networking and good relations with those around you. If for example, you find you are always being back-stabbed at work, or perhaps you are lacking support from superiors or colleagues at work, or constantly being picked on by a superior at work, you have a relationship problem.
However, many people often do not know that Feng Shui wofs bazi can also be used to keep relationships that have gone sour sweet, post the break-up. Breaking up a partnership or a joint venture or even breaking off a relationship for example, can be made easier, smoother and less contentious, by using the Yan Nian sectors. After all, in the business world (and even in your personal life), they say it pays not to burn your bridges! Through correct and appropriate use of the Yan Nian sector, ending of the relationship or the corporate divorce can be an amicable, amiable and pleasant affair, rather than a contentious name-calling exercise. Yan Nian, while not a Love Corner, is perhaps something of a ‘Don’t Hate Me’ corner.
Now, you might be thinking: what’s so special about Yan Nian and how does Yan Nian work to help relationships? To understand this, we must understand how Yan Nian sector is derived. Yan Nian is not a universal direction. It varies and is derived from either the individual’s Personal Gua (if used for personal directions) or the House Gua (if used to identify the appropriate sector in the house).
The Yan Nian sector is the sector where all the energies are completely balanced – there is where both Yin and Yang Qi is in harmony. Hence, the Qi is sentimental and calming, bringing balance to the emotions and enables the development of positive and healthy relationships.